Why Do I Always Feel Depressed

you always depressed? Do you always feel the need to fake a smile in the presence of people, while when you are at home, you feel like your heart is going to burst open? No matter how hard you try to make yourself happy or to put smiles on your face and in your heart, all your efforts seem futile. You just want to be truly happy, but you can’t. "Even in laughter, the heart is sorrowful, and the end of the mirth is heaviness," Proverbs 14:13. This article is definitely for you.

GUILTY CONSCIENCE: You can never feel true peace if your conscience is filled with guilt, and you feel guilty if you do something wrong, and until you correct your mistake or wrongdoing, you will be far away from peace. But sometimes you don’t always feel guilty because of a wrongdoing; you might feel guilty because you felt you didn’t do something to help a particular situation, and the outcome of your inability to help became disastrous. For instance, your friend invited you over, and you felt very tired to honour that invitation, but you didn’t want to hurt your friend’s feelings, so you decided to make flimsy excuses and ended up not going to see im or her. Some days later, you got the bad news that your friend committed suicide and died due to depression and self-loneliness. You knew nothing of this issue because your friend was very good at hiding the secret. He or she was always putting up a smiling front; who would have guessed that he or she was dying of depression? There is an 80% possibility of you falling into self-guilt because there would always be this part of you telling you that if you had gone, maybe your friend wanted to open up and he or she wouldn’t have died. A guilty conscience may be because of a terrible thing you did or didn’t do, intentionally or unintentionally, but the outcome caused a lot of problems. If your conscience is not at rest, your heart will never find true peace.

UNFORGIVENESS: You should be familiar with these phrases.

• ‘I will never forgive you till I die.’
• ‘Over my dead body will I ever forgive you.’
• ‘Even in death, I will never forgive you.’

You might think that there is nothing harmless in the statement, or you have every right to say it if you really think about how hurt or betrayed you feel. It may interest you to know that it is definitely not true. People can be very wicked; people can hurt you unintentionally; and people can also intentionally hurt you. While some may realise their mistakes and later come to seek your forgiveness, others may never. But you owe it to yourself to forgive them. If you don’t forgive, you are slowly killing yourself. Not forgiving is like carrying a huge drum filled with water on your heart and your brain. It is like taking your heart and giving it to whoever has hurt you and saying to the person, "For what you have done to me, take my heart and crush it. Whenever I see or remember you, make sure you keep crushing and keep making me feel sad. So if your heart is not at peace, properly examine yourself. Who are you holding at heart? Who have you refused to forgive?

SURROUNDING YOURSELF WITH THE WRONG PEOPLE:  The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 15:33. "Be not deceived. Evil communications corrupt good manners" You may also be familiar with the saying "Show me your friend, and I will tell you who you are". If you surround yourself with fake friends, you will automatically be forced to fake everything in your life, including your own happiness. You will be dying in silence and faking your smiles because you are surrounded by fake friends. If you also attach yourself to unreliable and selfish friends with whom you can’t share your problems or rely on them to be a shoulder you can cry on when you are down, But if they always come to you when they need something, then you would never truly find peace. Your heart would always have this element of fear and uneasiness because, instead of being of help, they are only there to compound your problems for you. Your emotions would always be concealed because you couldn’t share them with those kinds of people, if they even cared to ask you. If you surround yourself with negative and pessimistic people who always see the negative and ugly side of things, you will always feel uneasy and never at rest because you will be scared to share your aspirations and achievements with them, lest they start to judge you. The same applies to mingling with gossips, haters, people who love to judge others, etc. You would never be at peace, because what you see them do to others, they do to you.

PUTTING YOUR CARE, HOPE, ATTENTION AND STRENGTH ON VAIN THINGS: "Let us not be desirous of vain glory, provoking one another, and envying one another." Galatians 5:26. If you take all your attention, hope, and strength and place them on something that you shouldn’t or that does not have essential value to your existence, it is like fencing yourself in and at the same time looking for a way out. You just keep entangling yourself in your own web, and then you are still screaming for help. Before you know it, you have fallen into depression, frustration, unhealthy obsessions, and other mental health diseases. The more you claim to be looking for a way out, the more you cage yourself. You will be given three instances to better explain this point, but it is important to note that there are over a hundred instances and more.

• Forcing your love on someone who doesn’t love you in return This not only taints your pride and dignity, it belittles you, and this is only associated with your self-confidence. It has other negative effects on your emotions, your mental health, your behaviours, and your life achievements. When you are supposed to pay attention to important things around you or to even people who love you for who you truly are, you waste it on someone who would never look at you the way you do. Love is not forced, earned, or rewarded; true love is natural and something beyond control. It is not your fault you fell in love with someone who doesn’t love you. But throwing your life away, causing yourself to become obsessed, and hurting yourself and other people around you just to get the person is foolishness, and that emotion has gone from love to obsession and greed. And by the time age begins to wear on you and your selfish aim has not been achieved, you will be filled with regret for abandoning your life for something not worth it. If you are in this category, go back and retrace your steps, or else true happiness and peace will be far away from you.
• Searching for quick wealth and fame. If you are chasing money as if it were a speeding vehicle and taking time to rest, think, and plan properly will make you lose the money entirely, then you will only end up in penury and also emotionally broken even if you make the money. True wealth is meant to last a lifetime and possibly transfer to the next generation, but you would never achieve this if you were in a hurry. Nothing good comes easy or fast. But if easy and fast is your only option, rest assured that peace will be very far away from you.
• Trying to prove your worth the wrong way and to the wrong people If you are not satisfied with the way you are, as long as it has no negative impact on your life or the lives of others, but you still want to change yourself because of senseless mockery from people around you who do not know your value or the values of life, you will live to regret it. Because you have a pot belly and your friend has a flat one, that doesn’t make her any better or prettier than you. Because most guys flock around her and treat you like you are non-existent, that doesn’t mean you are not beautiful or that you don’t have worth. You have to know that some of the guys you see around are just like your friend because of her physical endowment, and physical endowments don’t last. Besides, no matter how beautiful a person is, there is always someone more beautiful than that person. If you begin to go extra miles just to get approval from human beings and you take the opinions of people who do not really care about you and try to change yourself for them, you will kill yourself before your time due to depression. 

NOT KNOWING THE LOVE THAT CHRIST HAS FOR YOU: if you have examined all the other points and you find out that.

• You are confident and not easily intimidated or mocked.
• You are not money-driven, and you understand the true value of wealth and fame.
• You already have someone who truly loves you, and you love them in return.
• You have good friends.
• You don’t hold grudges.
• Your conscience is clear.

But you are not still truly happy; you must be missing the Christ factor in your life, which is the most important factor. Without Christ in your life, you would never truly be at peace.

"And he arose and rebuked the wind and said unto the sea, Peace be still. And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm." Mark 4:39. That sea represents your emotions, your feelings. The sea obeyed the voice of Jesus when his apostles cried for help. Your emotions can hear the voice of Jesus and be calm, but only if you give him permission to come in and help you. In Luke 1:79, Jesus came to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death and to guide their feet in the way of peace. But you have to call him first. He cannot come unless you invite him. Jesus is saying, Peace I leave with you, peace I give unto you. Not as the world gives, not peace from therapists or doctors, or from friends or comedians, not from drugs or medications, but everlasting peace from heaven. Let not your heart be troubled, nor let it be afraid. If you refuse to believe this truth, no matter how hard you try to lie to yourself, your heart will never truly feel peace.